Running Toward Love

It’s Wednesday.  We’ve been in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia for 4 days now and aside from fighting fatigue and a small stomach bug, the trip has been amazing.  Here's the day we arrived... that's overtired crazy-face:


And the plane we walked in on:

We arrived Sunday morning and had a bit of breakfast with several other couples at the guest house… they were all getting ready for a local church service which we would have loved to attend but decided against it since we had only slept a couple of hours since Friday.  We made our way to our room and plopped into bed for a nap.  After church, the group returned to the Guest House to pick us up for lunch and we ate at a local pizza place – I have been surprised at how well the Ethiopian people can put together an American meal.  I’ve heard that hamburgers here are to die for, but have yet to try one.  

EVERYONE we have met has been incredibly kind, personable and a pleasure to be around.  Here's some of the amazing staff of the guest house and our adoption agency: 

David and the amazing kitchen staff:

We’ve been waiting for this moment for 3 and a-half years now.  We’ve had so many ups and downs during that time – we’ve questioned whether it would ever even happen at times and I’ve prepared myself more than once for having to let go of this dream.  And here we were, now standing on the porch of the home my daughter has known most of her infant life.  Waiting. 

We were grateful that a couple of parents volunteered to take pictures of the moment so that we could focus purely on meeting her for the first time. 

When she rounded the corner of the door in her nanny's arms… friends, I really can’t describe what I was feeling.  Immense joy.  All the love I have been feeling for this child… the love that has grown ever since we began the process… finally found its mark.  The nanny handed Elsa to me and she was nervous... kept looking back at her nanny wondering what was happening.  Jim and I gently whispered to her, “it’s okay… it’s okay.  Momma’s got you.”  She whimpered for a few moments and then spent most of the rest of our visit pretty much just checking us out… not at all ready to trust us with a smile but okay just hanging out.  We’ve found that she’s very tired in the mornings and since Sunday has fallen asleep on my chest every morning.

Monday morning she started to lay her head on my chest with her eyes rolling back in her exhausted head, but just as she would begin to fall asleep, she would force her eyes back open.  I might see this as something many babies do when they don’t want to miss out on anything happening around them, but I think for Elsa that day it had more to do with not being ready to trust.  Each day she has taken less time to fall asleep as I’ve held her.  Tuesday she had ease at resting her head that wasn’t there the day before and then this morning after about 2 minutes of fussing and rubbing her eyes, closed her eyes and was asleep in a matter of seconds.  A triumphant moment for mom and dad!

The afternoons have met us with a buoyant, smiling, bouncing baby.  Seriously, she almost NEVER stops smiling.  One of the nurses, Wudi, can’t stop talking about how very active Elsa is…. and Elsa lights up whenever Wudi walks into the room. 

I have to say that I have been deeply overwhelmed by how much love these nannies have for the children.  There is no doubt in my heart that they love Elsa.  That they care for her as they would their own.  It adds a melancholy element to the whole thing – knowing they will grieve her coming home… that they will miss her.  And that Elsa will miss them even though as she grows older she won’t remember them.  This makes me sad, too.  I took pictures of Elsa with her nannies and still need to take one of her with Wudi… I want to capture as much of her time here as possible so that she can treasure it in some way as she grows up.

At our doctors visit today (where the doctor explains her medical history to us), I told Wudi and the doctor how grateful we are for the love they have for Elsa… that we could see how much they love her and that we thank God for how well they have taken care of her and made her the happy child that she is.  Wudi lowered her head with tears in her eyes and a huge smile on her face.   I look forward to printing pictures of these amazing women with Elsa and bringing them back as gifts when we return. 

Tuesday, we spent the morning at the Transition Home with Elsa.  Feeding her is a glorious experience.  The sound of her rhythmic breathing as she enjoys a bottle is one of the most joyful sounds in the universe.   The way she eats mashed fruit (a mixture of bananas, coconut, and, we think, mango) is stinkin’ adorable. 

And she spit up on me for the first time.  A lot. 

She is indeed very active when she isn’t tired.  She stands and crawls like a champ and bounces on her legs and makes all kinds of fun noises as she plays.  We brought along a couple of toys that she has taken some interest in – a small plastic book that squeaks when you squeeze it, a yellow duck that does the same… she drools like crazy – perhaps she’s teething.  Her smile… and the way her eyes sparkle with life when she does… well, it’s nothing short of miraculous. 

We enjoyed a traditional Ethiopian meal on Monday evening with the rest of the adoptive families and while we ate, were entertained by traditional Ethiopian dancers.  It was a highlight of the recreational aspects of the trip for me.  

Tuesday afternoon, we visited an orphanage and day care that cared for children with HIV called A-Hope.  The director spent a good deal of time explaining to us what they do there – providing medication and education for the children and day care services so parents could work during the day. 

I met a boy.  He was so very sick… the kind of sick I’ve only seen in pictures.  I asked his name, told him mine, and shook his frail little hand.  I walked away after talking to him thinking, with immense sadness, that he probably won’t be there when we visit next time… I pray that he is healed and I pray for my own heart that it would be made more like Jesus so that I could walk away from an experience like that and not feel fear that I have just contracted some horrible illness.  That I could be in a moment like that and feel only love. 

In spite of the poverty that is truly prevalent here, I have found that the people radiate a joy I rarely see in America.  This is a challenge and an inspiration to me.  I am inspired by the resilience of the people of Ethiopia.  Inspired by their ability to carry on and find true contentment with what they have.  Moved by the joy I have seen on so many faces here.  I am in awe of the rich history and culture of this country and I have fallen in love with it.  I pray that Ethiopia will continue to grow healthier and that there will be more opportunity for every person here.  

Tomorrow we will be going back to visit with Elsa, of course, and then the afternoon will find us souvenir and coffee shopping (you haven’t HAD coffee until you’ve had it here).   We will spend more time getting to know our new friends and this amazing country. 

Friday morning we will have our court date... and if all goes well, will walk away from that meeting as Elsa's legal mommy and daddy.  And THEN I can post some pictures of her smooshy little smiley face!

Yaaaaaaay!